What is attachment and why does it matter?

Do you have difficulty engaging in intimate relationships?  Deep down, do you believe that people are not trustworthy?  Do you worry that you care more about your intimate partner than they care about you?  Does closeness with others feel scary?

As relational creatures, we have a biological need for connection and attachment to others.  This is hard-wired into our survival system and, when threatened, leaves us in a state of distress.  Based upon early experiences with our caregivers, a template or pattern for how we engage in close relationship is developed.  Identifying your own style of attachment can be beneficial in understanding why you may react in certain ways in your close relationships and provides a context for the implicit negative beliefs that you hold. This gained insight is helpful in navigating relationships differently, increasing empathy with your partner/close friends, and guidance for healing.

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Photo by Rémi Walle on Unsplash

If you'd like a personal assessment of your own style of attachment, please click the following link.